When you've got so much to say it's called gratitude ... And that's right

I teach some music business classes at a couple schools. The one thing I envy the most is how young and fearless that age can be. The ultimate "me" time. A time when you don't really have to worry about anyone but yourself. I remember that time well. Right out of college at 20 and ready to do whatever it takes to get a job and get something going. Failure was not an option and I had the drive and selfishness of concentrating on myself to make it work. I knew it was going to take a lot of time, a lot of getting it right and a whole lot of getting it wrong, but working and learning from the ups and downs of whatever it was I was going to do. That kind of drive still exists in some of the kids I teach, but not as frequent. They want it too fast, don't really want to work for it too hard. Waiting for someone to get it or do it for them. Not all, but a lot of them. As a matter of fact, one of my classes, we discussed internships and I emphasized how important they were. Being in the environment even if you are answering phones, getting lunch, or picking up dry cleaning. Who cares. Rite of passage. While, many seemed to get what I was saying, i'm pretty sure the majority couldn't last a day without complaining and bailing.

Yesterday, I grabbed a box in a closet just to see what was in it. I knew it was photographs, and its always an adventure to see something from the past. In that box was a letter from CBS Records, from October 20, 1990. It was one of the 58 rejection letters I got when I got out of college and applied to every single department at every single label in New York. I was desperate to get an entry level job in the music business. I knew no one and my resume was absolutely horrible. I think it mentioned I was MD of my college radio station, I worked in a liquor store and graduated with a BA in Communications. oh...and I speak Spanish.

Basically, every single letter was nice and said something like "Thank you for your interest in (insert label here). Unfortunately, we have no positions open, but will keep your resume on file in case something opens up", which basically meant thanks, we will now shred this horrible resume. But those were the HR replies, and I appreciated them (and kept them) because they were typed and actually signed by someone, so it didn't feel like it was a general form letter. I applied to every single department hoping to get past the guards.

I think I got about 50+ of these letter all around the same time in October 1990. But I kept at it. At the time, I was living with my brother in the apartment that we grew up in. Our parents had moved out of the country after I graduated High School for work, so we were able to live there with roommates to cover the $865.00 rent for a 2 bedroom on the 23rd floor on the east river, with a view of the Empire State Building and the manhattan skyline and the World Trade Center from the bedroom window. You never know what you got until its gone, huh? Anyway, I was working in Times Square at RKO Video renting movies to people while wearing an usher's vest and yellow clip on tie. I was not lazy in the least bit. Was earning my way since the age of 12 when I started a paper route all the way through High School and worked at a liquor store on weekends while at college. The drive is what has kept me alive all these years. Its called a "hustle" these days, but to me it was working to make a living. So with the flood of rejection letters, I was getting ready for my second stage of resume mailing when I got a random call from Columbia Records Promotion Department.

The call was from Delores Prezioso. She worked for the head of the promotion department and she had received my resume. At that time, the department was looking for someone to come in and basically do anything and everything for the department that was a staff of about 20 people. They usually had interns, but interns were tough to train based on hours and commitment, so they had put together a budget to hire someone. The job was a "Per Dium" position. So not on staff technically, no benefits and paid by the hour. The salary was still being figured out, but it was going to be between $5.00 and $8.00 and hour. But there would be overtime. After telling me, she asked if I was still interested. I said yes and we arranged a time for me to interview in person.

In the box of photos I was looking at earlier, inside the same envelope with the CBS Records rejection letter, was the piece of paper, an old Citibank envelope in red marker with Delores' name, the address and time for my meeting. 30 years later, here was the paper from the moment that changed my life.

The day of my interview, I got dressed, I actually wore a suit, I think... and went over to Black Rock. I honestly remember it like it was yesterday. Checked in, went up the elevator to the 12th floor, told the receptionist (Anne) that I was there to see Dolores. Sat down and waiting for someone to come get me. Dolores greeted me with a kind greeting and the best new york accent and NY vibe that I was immediately comfortable. I went back to her office int he bullpen that made up Columbia Records Promotion department. I was obviously overdressed and that I recall made me super uncomfortable. Dolores sat with me and her friend and executive assistant to the Rock Department, Cathy Thiele came and they asked me some questions, asked if I could manage on the salary and actually told me I was overqualified. Why? I asked, and the response was, "You graduated college"... it wasn't an academic position obviously. I honestly didn't care. I just wanted in. I was very lucky to get the job right then and there. I started my job on October 29th, 1990.

I got my first music business job. $8.00 an hour, no benefits, but I worked my ass off. Got in early, late to leave just so I could learn and get overtime to be able to pay my half of the rent. I never complained and loved working. I worked in the same area of some of the best in radio. My boss Burt Baumgartner, Jerry Blair, Jerry Lembo, Paul Rappaport, Jim "Rocky" Delbalzo, Lisa Wolfe to name a few, plus all the support staff, Dolores, Cathy, Jenni, Pam, Scott...just a great way to work in. The one lesson I learned was to just do what you are asked. Who was I? You had to earn it. The best part of my job was actually doing BDS distribution on Monday and Soundscan on Wednesday. The reason for this was because I had all these printouts I made that needed to go to every single department and every executive in said department. It was my way to meet new people and get to know other departments and what they did. I got to know every head of a department as well as the rest of them. You can't learn that shit in a text book. Networking, relationships, etc. These people are the ones that cheer you on later as you start to move up. They were never too busy to answer a question. Some great people for sure. Some are still friends today. Steve Tipp, who was the head of Alternative Radio, Kevin Gore was running Jazz, Nick Cucci was doing marketing, Brigette Roy was in Metal, the list goes on, I think the majority of my Facebook friends are either from High School or Columbia Records.

I tell this story to my classes, because I always want them to understand what it takes to get your foot in the door. Learn from my experience. Learn how, these opportunities, while some of the tasks suck. Who the fuck are you? Make your bones. Entitlement is a very ugly character trait.

From this position, relationships and hard work and humility, I was able to move forward and create a career for myself. Create a resume, put some numbers up and build a reputation. One thing though, was I always was interested in learning more. Moving to publishing, licensing, management, touring, merchandise whatever there was, I wanted to learn it so that if I ever needed it, I could do it myself (and I have to this day).

Finding that original note that lead to my last 30 year career was bittersweet. Where I am at at this point in my life is very reflective of where I was then. Hungry, not ready to give up and open to all possibilites. Not limiting myself to what I had done or was known for. The difference is at 50, you can't live selfishly. Many of us have responsibilities beyond ourselves. We aren't able to live off of $8.00 with overtime. Instead of having a resume that is blank, resumes are stacked with experience and success. But, now that seems to have become an undesirable asset.

When I look at my parents, they worked to provide, enjoy life and have a plan for the later years. Retirement, having a legacy to pass on to their kids, equity to support their families when the clock runs out.

From talking to many of my friends, I'm not alone when we look back with joy and look forward with fear. I never lived beyond my means, but did enjoy life while earning a good salary. I have not worked for a company to be able to contribute to my 401K for over a decade, so when looking at assets and legacy, it's pretty alarming. But, in the same spirit I had since the age of 12, I work hard to take care of shit. I am so fortunate to be able to make it work. I see all these young "up and comers" and it saddens me to see how they live for the now. I think they all think it will go on forever. I think if there is one thing I can do, is try and mentor these talented younger individuals to think long term. The sad part is, many don't want to. I see the lists that come out of the 30 under 30 where usually only 30% of those make it to the 40 under 40 lists. There aren't any 50 under 50 lists, because I don't think they could find 50 people over 50 that are still relevant...maybe 20 or 30.

When I was coming up, I looked at the careers of those I aspired to be and they were my age today and still going. I didn't see 40 becoming the standard expiration date. Maybe it was my own fault. Not looking to point the finger at anyone, blame anyone, i'm in control of what I can do for myself.

What I will ask of hiring managers and HR, please stop looking at a good resume and saying i'm overqualified (after the math is done and see how old I am). Nobody is overqualified when they want to work. Overenthusiastic, maybe. But that should be an asset. The new rejection email has lost its gravitas from when you got it in the mail. At least back then, someone had to type it out and you knew someone actually did the work of letting you down easy vs the automated rejection in a form letter that comes to you once not enough key words were picked out of your resume for consideration.

I'm so grateful for who I am, where I am... am I ready to quit and call it a day. Fuck no. So, I'll keep doing my thing, helping those I can help and keep on trying to make my kids proud. And I'll never forget that phone call I got from Dolores in October of 1990 that set me up for the next 30 years.

For the young achievers... fuck man... get out there, take some risks, lose a couple, get yelled at, pick up dry cleaning. Trust me. It will all pay off down the line. Learn what you want to be and learn what you never want to be. Sometimes the worst bosses are the best ones, because you figure out what you won't ever do to people. Live with your parents, live with 5 roommates, do overtime even if it doesn't pay. You ain't shit yet... but you will be soon. Soon you will have your own Dolores make that call to you that will start your career.

I hope over the years, I can be remembered as someone who made that call to them.