Valentines Day. The Rose no one really knows

In 1994, when I was working at Columbia Records, i signed a band from Detroit called Sponge. If you are of the 90's you would know them or at least have heard their song "Plowed" (Yes, one of Howard Stern's favorite songs). It was a great time in the business. Records were selling, expense accounts were flowing, labels were developing artists. There was room for growth. But as we know, all good things must come to an end.

But that's not what this blog is about. That's a boring "i remember back" story that old fuckers like me seem to rehash daily, like guy I knew that would always remind me how much gas cost when they were kids. Only difference of course being, when they would talk about gas, i would know what they were talking about. If I mention Sponge to anyone under 30, they look at me with zero connection or reference. Then i have to remember, most of them were born after Kurt Cobain died. Where did the time go?

Anyway, back in 1994, I also met a wonderful young lady, who happened to be the 12 year old daughter of my friend Joe, who was a guitar player in Sponge. This young lady's name was Rosalyn. Funny, smart, and just a natural star. She was like a little sister to me from the get go. She had the luxury of growing up when her dad's band was in its prime. Got to go on tour, meet bands and just live the life. She had a natural gift for music and her enthusiasm and fearlessness, made me want to help her out. This lead to my first endeavor with her. One day, she was walking around her house singing a song over and over again. This of course because something her dad would tell Vinnie, the singer of Sponge about. They wrote and song and told me about it. I told them I would pay to have them record it and we could make a 7" from it. So, just like that, "I'm A Big Girl" with the b-side being "Femme Fetal" by Velvet Underground was recorded under the name 27 Mauve. The song would be performed as an encore on tour, sometimes with Rosalyn performing it, sometimes just the band. But, it because a fan favorite and we sold out of the 7" that were sold at shows.

It was pretty much set up to be a novelty item. But, Rose got the bug and just naturally gravitated to the guitar and singing. Her heroes at this point being Nirvana and Hole. She was all about that and punk rock. I was proud. I have always loved turning people onto music and she was ripe for influence. She of course, though a lot of the stuff i was turning her on to was shit. But, she was 14 at this point. It's expected.

I always knew something would happen with her, just what and when wasn't clear. During these next couple of years, with Saint Cobain being her religion, not only was she influenced by the music, but by the demons too. Neither I nor her dad were aware of this for a long time.

In 1999/2000, I had the ultimate highlight, situation both professionally and as a music fan experience. I spent a short time (a little less than a year), managing Rancid. One of my favorite bands that I had met in 1996 while at Columbia. Long story short, I was in the beginning of the (well documented) bidding war that ended very bad for one guy. I always kept a very good relationship with them (specifically Tim) because it was never about me getting the band. It was about them getting the best situation and when it didn't pan out in my favor, it was ok and i let them know that. Because of that, 5 years later they would ask me to look after them. It really was a dream come true for me. One of the bonus of that time working with Rancid, was being with Tim on a daily basis. At that time, he was married to Brody, who was starting a band called The Distillers. They were a 3 piece and fucking awesome. But, like Rancid (who were originally a 3 piece), i could see them needing a 2nd guitar player. One day I casually asked Brody if she would consider a 2nd guitarist and she told me she was dying for one, but wanted a girl and couldn't find one. The bell in my head rang (maybe that's why i have tinnitus)and I told her about Rose. I even told her she was coming out to visit me in a week or two (she wasn't), but i wanted them to meet each other. Brody was stoked and told me to make sure to have them meet when she came. Now, I needed to call Rose and her dad to see if she was interested and ask if i could fly her out to stay with me for a couple weeks to have her meet Brody. I got "Yes" all around, booked her a ticket, had her come out. Her and Brody met, and I think i saw her maybe 2 more times over the next two weeks. The two were inseparable and just clicked. It was awesome. Rosalyn, was now in The Distillers and recording and touring. She was 16 turning 17.

The next couple of years, i didn't see her, but kept tabs on her. I was always a phone call away, but she was living the rock and roll life. I still had no idea of her demons or how deep they went. After the 1st tour, she, now known as "Casper Rose" ended up moving to Berkeley and living with her then (most awesome) boyfriend Tim, who she met when he was in a band called Nerve Agents, who were also on the same label, Hellcat. I went up to visit her a couple times (i have no recollection why), but things seemed like they were not 100%. I would get calls from her dad or from her sometimes, when there was an issue that i could try and help out with, but she was a big girl. The Distillers ended up making their next album Sing, Sing Death House, where Rose actually contributed on songwriting on songs as felt like the band was going to pop. They had all the best going for them. But, Rose was a mess. Dope sick, addicted, every parents nightmare. They went on Warped Tour and she was literally out of control. She was literally the Sid Vicious of the band. Pure, real, a showman, but extremely volatile, unpredictable and dangerous to herself and to others. Fat Mike even wrote a song about her on the NOFX album War on Errorism called "Decom-Posuer" that basically was his observation of her. The bands motivation to move forward and her motivation of derail brought them to a parting. Rose left The Distillers soon after and honestly, for the public, her whereabouts became those of Big Foot. Many stories, theories, folklore.

For me and her dad, it was sad to see it happen, both of us knew her talent and how she was just self sabotaging her life. Nothing could be done. She was a dope addict with no motivation. The Distillers went on to do great. Even announcing a reunion (sans Casper Rose). It absolutely has been a "what if" for me. I don't think she ever cared as much as we did. But that was her at the time.

Over the next 10 years, with her dad being a very close friend, I would know what she was up to, where she was living, making sure she's alive. We would speak whenever she called me and I would always try and encourage her music. I promised her, anytime she had a desire to record, i would pay for it. She would "clean up", get motivated, call me, tell me about songs she wrote, send me demos. I sent her in the studio like 2 times over those years, the results would be inspiring, but usually organized confusion. But, what I did find was a voice and a natural gift. But, that gift and voice were wasted as long as she was a junkie. There is a lot of truth to the saying "Never trust a junkie". I just couldn't give up on her. We had so many start/stops of recovery, so many heartaches and conversations I would have with her dad. But he was amazing and also never gave up.

In 2012 (i think), she moved to Tallahassee, FL. She had to get out of Detroit, where she knew every junkie, thief, asshole in the world and was going to be found one day in an abandoned house shooting gallery. Her mom (xoxo Margo), was moving down there with her husband at the time and son and took Rosalyn. But, better weather doesn't take the junk out of the junkie. Junkies are like cockroaches, they live anywhere and everywhere. We started speaking again when she got down there. She really wanted to start playing again, and like I always promised, if she did, i would pay for it. We had more stop starts and she ended up meeting a good guy and having a baby.

Gia was born and I was sure this was the fix. It took a while, but through ups and downs, she made the decision and came to the realization that life wasn't going to be shit anymore. She checked herself into a rehab and remained there for a full year. While in there, she had self realizations, did yoga, worked on herself and did it for Gia. We would speak periodically, and she had a guitar and was writing songs. As always, I promised when she got out, i would pay for her to record.

She got out or rehab in 2016, she went to Detroit for Christmas and recorded 4 amazing songs that we released super DIY on an EP called Songs from Rehab. Musically, the EP is excellent. Lyrically, honest. It was a great return to the world. Not a "throw it out there", but a commitment and dedication. We set up social media accounts to slowly ease her back into the world. She was warmly received and reconnected with Brody though social media. That was a good closure, full circle for her. Both Moms now, still writing and playing. The Ep was a very quiet release, got a little press, put out a 7" with a great indie label in LA called Wink And Spit. The label owner (and artists herself) Kelsey was a Distillers fan and reached out to her through social media. We had no expectations for the release, I just wanted to encourage her songwriting and get her going and doing what she is gifted to do.

A year passed and life happens. You have kids, they take priority. She's a great mom and just such a wonderful human. She called me in August and stared sending me songs she was working on. They were all great. So, we made a plan to record again. So once again at Christmas, she went back to Detroit and recorded 3 new songs with her band which includes her dad, Joe on bass.

We just released the 1st of the 3. A song called Valentines Day. Again, a lyrically honest song with a beautiful melody and vocal performance. We made a video on her iPhone that Gia shot and I edited with my limited editing skills (DIY). The reception has been good so far. Hopefully more people discover it, because it deserves it.

Never give up. This has been what I have lived by. You believe in something or someone, stick with them. I believe in Rose. Since she was 12. I'm not looking to get rich, but what I can do is help her express herself and hope other people discover her too. I teach at a music school. I believe in passion and if there is something there. i want to be someone who at least can help them see it in themselves and maybe even move the ball forward.

Rose could have easily have given up. Shit, she actually did a few times, but she bounced back. From junkie to mom. Never lost her heart and never lost me. Her continuous hard work at keeping her life together and fueling her creativity. Building a great life with her boyfriend Thomas, his kids and the light of her life Gia, i couldn't be prouder of her.

Happy Valentines Day, Kid.

You're Sheer Perfection (Thank You)

When I read the rumor yesterday that someone had been found unresponsive at Paisley Park, I got mad that anyone would create a stupid rumor. But, in typical fashion, the rumor was proven right within 5 minutes of the original post.

Prince was dead.

I was about to start teaching a class to 6 young students who weren't even a thought in their parents minds when Purple Rain came out. Shit, They weren't a thought when Emancipation was released... But what was amazing was when I told them the news, it hit them as if it was an artist they grew up on, just as I did.

I taught my class and every 10 minutes, i would have to break my lecture to talk about Prince. But, it didn't hit me emotionally, it was more of the shock and the memories I had that related to him and his music. I actually finished the class early by 15 minutes, which is something I never do, because I like to hear myself talk... but I was out of things to say. It really was shock.

After that, I spoke to a couple friends, but still wasn't hitting me. Then every station was doing their tributes, monuments being lit up in purple, news reports, twitter comments, Facebook comments. There was no ignoring the truth.

This morning it hit me and I got to remembering why this individual was so important to me. It was the music. It was the swagger. It was the punk rock. It was the fuck it attitude. It was everything he was about.

I first heard Prince in (I want to say) 1980. My friend Nakato Mubanda, who was a few years older than me let me borrow Prince's 2nd album. We both lived in Waterside Plaza and Nakato and her brothers were like an extended family. We all knew each other from going to school together, hanging out on the plaza together, it was NYC in the 80's. She handed me the album and I remember looking at it wondering who this dude was and why was he on a Pegasus on the back? I put that album on and I don't think a week has gone past where I haven't listened to something by Prince. I still have that record. I think it's too late to give it back. plus, I don't know where Nakato is, but I love her and her brothers and thank her for our friendship to this day.

My love for Prince would only continue for the years. I remember buying Controversy and actually learning The Lords Prayer because of this album. It was kinda how i learned my times tables through Schoolhouse Rock. It needed to be something I could sing, I guess. Anyway, that album came with (like many of Prince's LP's) a poster of Prince in a bikini in the shower with a crucifix hanging on the shower tile. I thought this was the funniest thing ever and remember showing it to my mother thinking she would hate it Well, she didn't. So much for teenage rebellion. Only Prince could come up with songs, lyrics and imagery that would stick in your head forever. He was also that artists that could put such a poster in the album and both women and guys (straight or gay) would hang it up in their room.

Then of course would come 1999 and MTV. We all knew Little Red Corvette by heart and 1999 of course. But it was that double album that we would all learn word for word and play at every party. This songs introduced people to Prince, but he wasn't about only the hits. We all knew what D.M.S.R. stood for and that was an album track. Every song on this album sounds just as fresh today as it did in 1981. The man was brilliant. How many artists could write a song about the millennium 18 years the would become the anthem for the turn of the century?

Then there was Purple Rain. I remember being in Nova Scotia visiting family that summer. I had just turned 15 and the movie was coming out the following week. I made my dad take me, because there was no way I was going to miss that film the day it came out. It was a musical version Star Wars. I just watched it and felt like, what the fuck just happened. You could feel something happening to everyone there and it showed as the year went on. Prince was now a household name. The album was a classic. It was still Prince. He never changed for anyone. it was sexual, controversial, heart felt, funky, guitar heavy and pop. Nobody could do that and cross so many musical genres and gain such die acceptance from everyone.

I could go on and on about the obvious... but I feel like everyone has the same types of memories. Some additional highlights that involved Prince included... He was the only artists I camped out all night to get tickets to his 1988 Lovesexy Tour at Madison Square Garden (i snuck in a tape recorder and taped it), I got to see his purple BMW parked outside of the Record Plant everyday while Tim Palmer was mixing the debut Sponge album. During that time, found out that Prince would go in around 10pm, write, record and mix a whole album by the following morning. I actually got to see him there once. We were told not to look at him, but I was all "fuck that, I'm looking", so I did and when he saw me I immediately looked at the floor. Yes he had that kind of vibe.

I got to see him play two surprise shows at the House of Blues, one private event at Roseland, traded tapes with other fans of rarities, live shows and demos (much like the Grateful Dead fans would trade live shows), made many friends just because of our love of Prince.

I think I own every 12" he ever put out and every CD. With Prince, it wasn't about the hits. It was about the b-sides as well. There are so many songs that people may or may not know about. For example, the B-side of Mountains, from Parade was "Alexa De Paris"...an instrumental that he plays drums on that just will blow your mind. I would have posted it, but you won't find it online.

All the songs he wrote for other people that were huge, the artists he nurtured, the careers he made and the musicians he discovered... his legacy is one of a legend indeed.

I will forever miss him. Even though I wasn't into the later stuff as much, he was still and will only be the only Prince.

What other artist could be identified by a single name, a symbol and a color.

If you need me, I'll never leave
I know, that you know, without you there is no me
There is no me
Without you there is no sea
There is no shore
Love is to weak to define how much I adore
You, child
You, child
The last words you hear

Goodnight, Sweet Prince.